• inboxity : Humorous

Thin People Don't, They just thinks differently

I read every diet I can get my hands on. I even follow their suggestions. But eventually, inevitably, I always get fat again.

Now, at last, I've found The Answer. After living for almost 14 years with a man who never gains an ounce no matter what I serve him, I've found out what it is that keeps him thin:
He thinks differently.

The real difference between fat and thin people is that thin people:
- avoid eating popcorn in the movies because it gets their hands greasy
- split a large combination pizza with three friends
- think Oreo cookies are for kids
- nibble cashews one at a time
- think that doughnuts are indigestible
- read books they have to hold with both hands
- become so absorbed in a weekend project they forget to have lunch
- fill the candy dish on their desks with paper clips
- counteract the midafternoon slump with a nap instead of a cinnamon Danish
- exchange the deep-fryer they received for Christmas for a clock-radio
- lose their appetites when they're depressed
- think chocolate Easter bunnies are for kids
- save leftovers that are too skimpy to use for another meal in order to make interesting soups
- throw out stale potato chips
- will eat only Swiss or Dutch chocolate, which cannot be found except in a special store
- think it's too much trouble to stop at a special store just to buy chocolate
- don't celebrate with a hot-fudge sundae every time they lose a pound
- warm up after skiing with black coffee instead of hot chocolate and whipped cream
- try all the salads at the buffet, leaving room for only one dessert;find iced tea more refreshing than an ice-cream soda
- get into such interesting conversations at cocktail parties that they never quite work their way over to the hors-d'oeuvre table
- have no compulsion to keep the candy dish symmetrical by reducing the jelly beans to an equal number of each color
- think that topping brownies with ice cream makes too rich a dessert
- bring four cookies into the TV room instead of a box;think banana splits are for kids

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Tags: thin people diet fat living gains ounce chocolate eating lose movies pizza cookies doughnuts lunch

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